A Summer Solstice Birth: Fenton's Birth Story

This Summer Solstice was one I'll never EVER forget. It was on this day that our little Fenton Tyler Brown decided to join our family earth side.  This is His birth story.  A little more nervous this time because I knew what to expect, but I also had forgotten the details of how intense it really was. June 20th, ( Friday night) the contractions were constant and about 7minutes apart. This is it, I thought, we are finally going to meet our little baby. The kids were tucked in bed and I had asked my doula to come by and talked to my midwife who would be on her way as soon as she could. Well... what do you know... as soon as my doula, Xylina showed up my contractions subsided and faded away. I got back in bed and was half slept as the contractions deepened and then morning came... no baby. I was bummed and totally felt bad that I had called Xylina and Dana for nothing.  I spent Saturday (which was also Summer Solstice) with my girlies and husband relaxing. For most of the day I went and laid on my bed turned on some relaxing music and slept and meditated while my body surged, relaxed, and surged. The contractions weren't painful but intense and when I was laying in my bed listening to music I could really enjoy them. They came in waves and it was nice to just let my body go with the flow. With each new wave I reminded myself that I was opening up and that soon I would meet my little baby. I would remind myself that my body was designed to do this work and that it was going to be beautiful. I spent the day in and out of bed sleeping, relaxing, eating, and contracting. It was nice to have Jordan there to take care of the kiddos while I rested for the night ahead of me. Tonight would be the night. We sent the girls to Linda's for a sleep over so that we wouldn't have to worry about them waking up, we could just do what was needed to be done to get this little one here. Around 9:00 the contractions became so intense I couldn't do anything but moan through them, trying to balance out that energy and it so works.. making a deep sound made it easier. We decided that it was now time to get Xylina and Dana here. They both arrived at the same time and it was perfect timing. Everything was starting to begin. I was nervous but so ready, I had spent the day really preparing myself.  I had a birthing tub ready to go if I wanted it but I never felt the need to fill it up, I had really enjoyed my bed during the day and felt like I would be most relaxed there. I continued to lay in bed as the contractions picked up, Jordan by my side (who actually fell asleep for a little bit) and Xylina sitting right next to me and talking me through each contraction. It is THE BEST IDEA to have a Doula! I swear. She just took my mind off of everything and helped me focus on deepening and opening and trusting my body. After a while laying in my bed I needed to go pee so we headed on into the bathroom and this is when it got serious. Not only did I need to pee but I was definitely ready to open completely up. I remember thinking I can't do this... I can't do this.. and Xylina was there reminding me that it was going to feel intense and a little crazy but that I SO CAN DO THIS! She helped me let go of everything and then it was time to push.. I could feel the urges and I didn't want to move away from the toilet BUT I also didn't want to deliver my baby UMMM on the toilet. Dana reassured me that where ever I felt comfortable I would be fine. After a few pushes on the toilet I decided that I wanted to be somewhere else. I don't think I hardly had my eyes open for any of this I just remember being on my toilet and then I had moved back onto my bed. Here we go, I got up on all fours and moaned this baby right out of me. My water broke as I did this. I remember feeling the baby right there ready to come out and then slipping back, and then I felt the baby's head and then a few more pushes and out came baby. Jordan was able to do the catching and after he caught the baby I looked around to him, forgetting about EVERYTHING that had just happened and just being so excited to know what we had. "What is it!?!? What did we have!?!?" I asked him. "A BOY!" He said. We were both SOOOO pumped! He then handed me the baby and I sat down got all comfortable and cozied with this new little bundle of joy.  Fenton Tyler Brown was born at 11:26pm on 2014 Summer Solstice, weighing 7lb 4oz and was 19inches long. 

Again, I was very pleased with having my baby at home, surrounded by the beauty and love of his family. It was relaxing and peaceful here I wouldn't have wanted it any other way! So... 4 days later and my body is healing like a champ and little "F-Bomb" or "F-Dawg" as Jordan refers to him or "Buddy" that Lexi and Eva call him and AKA "my Fenton baby" is as pink as he can get, he loves his momma's boobies and his sleep.  I am feeling so blessed that we have him here to complete our family. A little boy is just what this family needed! Welcome little one. 

Inspirational: The Alternate Routes--Nothing More

I absolutely LOVE this song so much. The words just lift my heart and spirit. It is the perfect song to take me out of a grumpy mood and to remember---  WE are LOVE.  WE are ONE. We are PEACE.  We are WAR.  We are how we treat each other and nothing more.
The Alternate Routes -- Nothing More

Hope you all are having a wonderful Monday! 

Full Moon in Sagittarius

art by Susanne Shuenke

I am in love with the energy that comes with a full moon. At times I can feel really drained, and then there are times that I am SUPER energized but in all that comes there is a place where I sit and am able to reflect on the past month--where I've gone, what I've learned. I make sure I set time aside to step inward and enjoy what each full moon has to teach. It has become a routine for me to visit certain teachers that help me understand whats happening in the stars and to help me look within. And I've loved everything I've read, listened to, and experienced. HUGE BONUS is that it is all free and you can have access to this amazing information just as easily! 
Full Moons are time to sit and be with what has already shown up for you and to accept all that has arrived and taught. Time to be in a place within your own self, and to be understanding of YOUR unique journey. A perfect time to take in all that you have been given. 
The Full Moon was in Sagittarius a time to get honest with yourself and with the path that you are on. I wanted to share with you the THREE people that I go to when I want to know what kind of energy to expect for the Full Moon and to experience the moon at her fullest.
The first place I go is to KV (Aquarius Nation) for her videos or written horoscopes for the full moons. I go to this chick DAILY to check in with whats going on around us and I am in love with her positive outlook on this beautiful Earth life and has so many great GREAT and wise words of wisdom to share.  Here's her Video

The second favorite place of mine is Mystic Mamma who posts little bits and pieces of all these WONDERFUL astrologists! It's great place for so much insight! You can check her page out as well!

Mystic Mama
The last... (but DEFINITELY NOT LEAST) person I go to is Athena, the Sage Goddess! She holds these BEAUTIFUL Full Moon rituals connecting hundreds together on a journey of self exploration. You can attend a live event or visit at a later time if it isn't convenient for you. After each ritual I feel rejuvenated and leave with so much inspiration and insight to my own being. My heart is full and my body tingles with the magic that is inspired in this space. If you are into rituals or curious at all You need to check out this beautiful lady! I'm sending you to her facebook but you can also visit her website here.
Athena the Sage Goddess

Have fun with this energy and don't get too caught up in everything you THINK you should be doing. Allow yourself to FEEL and have fun with the person you are TODAY in this moment in this Full Moon in Sagittarius! 

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A Divine Message: the Dragonfly

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The other day I was out on my porch staring off into the beauty of a wonderful sunny day, it was quiet, and warm. I felt something touch my shoulder, I quickly checked it out making sure it wasn't a spider and saw a beautiful dragonfly a few seconds later another flew by and then another and another. For the next few moments our front yard had 5 or 6 dragonflies swooping down and around and then away. It was beautiful.
Maybe you are a believer of magic maybe you are not but this was magical and to me this was a beautiful message from the Universe, something Divine just for me in this exact moment. All my life I've been a believer in the secret world of the unknown. It's the child in me that comes out when little messages are delivered. They brighten my whole day! 
It's hard to always "see" these messages, you have to be on the watch out. This all could have happened right in front of me and if I had not been paying attention I would have missed everything. And the saddest part of that is missing out on the feeling that comes with these messages. For me, they are overwhelmingly joyful and full of so much love. I am physically moved and feel as if I were just instantly given a hug. 
I believe there is Divine meaning in everything that we do. Little secrets here and there guiding us, and keeping us on the path of our sacred contract (what we are here on earth to accomplish). I also feel that so many have allowed the fast paced, busy life, take up our moments and swallow them whole leaving us feeling lost, drained and unaware of what is truly going on in our lives. Time takes away our little moments of joy that are supposed to leave us with clues. Time hides this away and leaves us feeling rushed and having never enough enjoyment in our lives. 
This was moment of mine lasted maybe MAYBE 2 minutes. TWO MINUTES! And it filled me with so much happiness that I forgot about the dirty details of the day like my laundry, my dishes, the endless amount of housekeeping and allowed me to feel LOVED and left me with a clue that I was where I needed to be at that exact moment to receive a message that affirmed that I was INDEED on the right path. 
For me, I follow the native medicine cards when it comes to earth medicine and divine messages. I have the medicine card book that I often rummage through and I also love going to this website to read about the different totems and spirit animals. 
The Message I received: You are in transformation and making little changes here and there that are for the betterment of your spirit. Don't allow illusions and yucky habits keep you from finding the beauty in the simple acts of change. Know you are working towards something great. Believe in YOU. 
Out of 1440 minutes in a WHOLE day. There are 2 of those minutes that I can actually recall and they meant the whole world to me. I wasn't LOOKING for this message but I was OPEN to this message. I was allowing myself to slow down and pay attention. 

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These moments happen more and more often for me as I'm beginning to trust in the Universe to guide me. They happen more often when I take the time to BREATH and just Be. 
My Challenge for you is to slow down a little bit. Don't be in too much of a hurry, so that you are missing out on those little life clues and all the magic that is happening right in front of your eyes? The messages are everywhere, always, constant. Because these are messages of love and support. 
PS. A few days after my dragonfly incident I received a BEAUTIFUL card in the mail from my Mother and on the front was.... a dragonfly. Just a little affirmation to me once again.  

Inspirational: Kellee Maize

I absolutely LOVE this chick. I just barely found out about her. She's been doing her thing for a few years now and I am just excited to hear her music. It is SO MUCH MORE than just music. Listen to her words!! She definitely knows whats UP!  She is definitely INSPIRING! Here are three videos that I really LOVED and are FILLED WITH SO MUCH TRUTH!  Check her out! 

Google Female Rapper

"Give & let live.Grow & let go. Be & set free.   Don't know, but let it flow.All ONE, but not the same."

Dance with Lightening

" Take action, seek sight. We are going to WIN this fight. 

   I'll die for the world to get right."

Frack Track 

 I can't even explain how important it is to watch this one! I don't even have words. WE ARE KILLING OUR MOTHER. And MOST of us are completely unaware.. or too greedy to care! Shame on the human race!